Monday, August 08, 2005

jazz nite!

oh man.. tonight is such a jazzy nite!

been listening to my jazz collection ever since i got home at around 1..

feeling very jazz now.. hahaha.. maybe shld upload all my jazz collection to my neeon later.. :D

anyway, juz wondering.., maybe coz of the conversation i had earlier with someone.., why do pple always pressurize in a relationship? especially when theres a break-up.. somewhat, i dun understand.. but, after some serious thinking, i came out with two conclusions.. firstly, maybe the person pressurize the other party coz he/she simply can't put the relationship off.. as in, fell too deeply for the relationship till dun wanna let go of it.. secondly, maybe he/she is juz feeling sore.. coz he/she ain't the one who initiate the break up..(this thought is abit extreme.. coz of ego!)..

what do u pple think?

frankly speaking, i have yet to try pressurizing the other party.. not coz i m always the one initialing breakups.. in fact, i am always the one kanna broken off.. hahaha.. maybe i m juz not the type whereby can have a long lasting relationship one bah.. ok.. back to the point.. i feel that pressurizing the other party in an attempt to get back a broken relationship is only juz an option to turn to when theres totally no hope.. but, pple juz simply keep using it as an excuse to get back the relationship, thus, making it insignificant in the end.. i mean.. whats the point of telling the other party, "i feel like dying...", "i will kill myself..", "i will jump off my flat", "i will go against the law", "i will go bang down the wall of my room..", etc., aiyo!!! its so silly lor.. hahaha.. maybe i got use words like the above before, but, not of what i can remember.. still, it isn't the way to go for.. isnt it?

hmmm.. really dun know.. as i told my friend earlier on.. maybe i shall try it next time.. if i have a chance to.. hahaha.. hopefully not sia! coz, it will be very childish of me to do so.. moreover, i have a promise to keep.. a promise which i make to myself.. ending my count of relationships at 6.. currently is already the 5th broken relationship i had.. hahaha.. which effectively rules out any further relationship than the next one..

hmmm... am ready to have my 6th in my life.. but, too bad.. 6th doesn't want me.. hahaha.. wait bah.. wait till one day she might have a change of heart.. its not going to be an easy wait.. but, willing to give it a try! ;)

aiyah.. dun know la.. really sad to know that i have lost my feelings.. juz like an animal.. totally no feel for things anymore.. ok.. not all animals.. maybe, i shall start looking into accepting pple into my life the way they are? not as easy as juz saying.. it take lots of effort to make it a reality!

shall start doing some work le.. though abit slpy.. still, gotta pull myself to do some work!!! nites, peepz.. ;)

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